Dear Beijing

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Dear Beijing,

Congratulations! We've made it through six months together. It's been quite the adventure!

Initially, I was scared of you. I arrived both petrified and excited and so exhausted. I didn't know how to get around, where to get food or a single person for my first few days. It was frightening, but I knew I needed to give it a try.

It slowly got better. I started meeting people from EF who mentored me through the process of finding an apartment and figuring out where to eat! I relished my time at work and now I appreciate that I was just thrown into my classes with no training. It gave me some purpose to fuel me through the other aspects of my new life here. Plus, when they are not being naughty, my students are pretty wonderful.

I feel it is pretty amazing how much my feelings about you have changed. I couldn't stand the smell of you every time I walked out the door for the first few weeks, and crossing the street was a stressful event. I would get so defensive when people walked past me staring. It was hard and I missed home.

Now, though, I'm mostly really happy. I'm still a little nervous crossing the street, but it's not terrifying. I love walking around outside now and noticing so much. I love watching the senior citizen exercising in the park blocks, noticing cars that are driving on the wrong side of the road, and listening to the friendly bickering outside of the fruit and vegetable stands. I love that in one of the most International cities in the entire world, there are still horses pulling produce around. I even smile back when people stare. Let them stare! I know I can be a bit of surprise in this neighborhood, and I like to think I've stopped judging people for doing it. Of course, I have my less confidant days when it bugs me more, but it's all part of the ride.

I have a lot to thank you for. You have brought me such wonderful new friends from all around the world. If I had just stayed at home, I would have never met them, and my world would be not as colorful. I feel like I am part of a good community, and being part of a community is such a necessary aspect of my happiness. I know this experience is temporary, and I feel that makes the friendships even sweeter.

Thank you for all the beautiful places you have in this city. It's pretty spectacular to be living in a place that hosts one of the oldest recorded civilizations. I've definitely been humbled by just the history of the wonderful places I have visited.

Most importantly, thank you for bringing magic back into my life. I had been so mad that my life hadn't been going as I thought it would, that I wasn't in the place that I should be in by now. That's because I was meant to be here. It has taken me some time to internalize that fact, but I truly believe that I need to be here. I love at night when I close the curtains in my apartment and I stare into you, my adopted city, that I have such a feeling of hope and possibility. Anything or anyone could be out there waiting to walk into my life.

Cheers to us, Beijing! May the next six months be just as intriguing.

Love,

Colleen

P.S. Dear Readers,

Thank you for reading my blog and giving me such wonderful support from home. I can't even express how much it means for me to have such a caring group of people rooting me on! I'm a lucky girl.

Love,

Colleen